AWOL Dieting

One of my New Year’s resolutions is to lose weight. So far, it’s been going okay but I need to buckle down and become as disciplined as an Army drill-sergeant with my eating.

This week I’ve eaten so many salads full of cucumbers, tomatoes, peppers, celery, croutons, sliced green olives and a luscious creamy balsamic dressing that my nose is beginning to twitch. This concerns me only in the sense rabbits twitch their noses.

But sometimes you desperately want to step off the proverbial scale and . . . eat . . . something  . . . unhealthy but amazingly delicious. Unhealthy as in loaded with fat and carbs. Isn’t that where all the great taste is?

Last night I fell, temporarily, off the dieting bandwagon dragging along my dear friend Kay who is also fighting the battle of the bulge.

We're having dinner at Tomatoes, a favorite local restaurant, which has great food.

Earlier in the day, I email her telling her in no uncertain terms, “I will not be eating anything healthy for dinner. I’ve eaten so many salads my nose is beginning to twitch.” We’ve been friends for so long we can say things like this to each other.

“Tonight”, I continue, “fat and carbs are the order of the day.” Before clicking “send” I add, “I’m also thinking about having dessert.” For Kay, this means “chocolate” and preferably plenty of it.

Just show Kay a piece of chocolate or say the word “chocolate” and you’ve got her full, undivided attention. Tomatoes makes a dynamite chocolate lava cake we always share thereby halving our calories, and the guilt, in the process.

We’re cruising the menu, and she’s on board with the fat and carbs, when I spy Classic Grilled Rueben. OMG!!! I haven’t had a Reuben in a long time. My mouth waters as I read  aloud, Thinly sliced corn beef piled high with melted Swiss cheese, sauerkraut and Russian dressing served on grilled rye bread. Not a tomato, cucumber, pepper or celery in sight! Perfect! It has all my favorite food groups including the requisite fat and carbs. Okay, I’m on board. As we often order the same thing, Kay's willpower crumbles within nanoseconds.

Twenty minutes later the waitress slides our sandwiches complete with ripple chips and a slim spear of garlic pickle in front of us. We’re in fat and carbs heaven!

Maybe I'm rationalizing but I think it’s good when dieting to temporarily defect to the other side, to remember the good old days when you could eat just about anything with no weight-inducing consequences.

My entire sandwich is gone but Kay has half a sandwich left for lunch tomorrow. The waitress appears and Kay asks her to wrap it up. As the waitress picks up both plates, she says, “Would you like dessert?” We already know what we’re going to have even before we ask her what’s available. Anxiously we wait until we hear her mention it and Kay stops her in mid-list with, “We’ll have the chocolate lava cake and two spoons.”

“Would you like ice cream with that?” asks the waitress.

We look at each other and before either of us can hesitate I say, “Absolutely.” Let’s face it if you’re going to engage in AWOL dieting why not go all the way!

Minutes later the waitress reappears with two spoons and our dessert. If you’ve never had chocolate lava cake you don’t know what you’re missing! It’s a small round chocolate cake oozing hot molten chocolate. It tastes even better when accompanied by a mound of vanilla ice cream, whipped cream and drizzled chocolate. Next time, I will take a picture although I’m sure your mouth is already watering.

While I can’t speak for Kay, I feel no pangs of guilt or remorse about dinner or dessert. I am shameless and proud of it.

After dinner we waddle over to the theater to see It’s Complicated with Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin. I won’t divulge the plot but I highly recommend the movie. There is a hilarious scene with Streep, a naked (tastefully done) Baldwin, and Streep’s laptop.

Tomorrow I’ll be back on the wagon . . . sort of.

Here’s to your own weight loss resolutions for 2010.

Namaste
Chris